Crazy Woman Talk

I wonder if this is just a woman thing, but have you ever noticed how non-committal women can be and yet speak in absolutes at the same time? “Maybe you’ll do this, but what if they did that? Oh, you’d NEVER go there.” Or, “things are ALWAYS a certain way”. That is pure, unadulterated crazy woman talk! Let us take a short, shallow journey into the female mind! I’ve compiled a list of a few helpful tips to manage the case of crazies.

  • I was literally eating a chocolate chip cookie one night complaining about my inability to lose weight. Quit being ridiculous (like me).
  • Ladies, stop expecting your men to read your mind. You think you want that, but you don’t. If they COULD read your mind – you’d be SINGLE. Why? Because you are bat crap crazy! You know what? Let’s just make that a general thing across the board. Don’t expect anyone to read your mind and anticipate your needs. Put on your big girl panties and tell people what you want/need. This is ridiculous.
  • Your spouse doesn’t need to hear every crazy thought that pops into your head. Get a twitter account.
  • Stop waiting for John Cusack to stand outside your window with a boombox blasting Your Eyes by Peter Gabriel. This isn’t the 80’s. He is not coming.
  • No more excuses. We all have reasons why we CAN’T do things. Truth is, if you want something bad enough, you’ll make a way.
  • Your big break is NOT coming. We make our own breaks.
  • No one in this life owes you anything. Don’t expect things from people they are incapable of.
  • Stop adding items to your bucket list until you’ve checked a few things off.
  • Most of all, women, I’d like us to stop sizing each other up. I think this starts when we’re little girls and we carry it into adulthood. Stop comparing yourself to others. God made you beautiful the way you are.  So, love yourself. Love those around you.
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